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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25773637">don't mess with the memories (of a life passed on)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissMoonshine/pseuds/MissMoonshine'>MissMoonshine</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>W.I.T.C.H.</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Canonical Character Death, F/F, Gen, Lots of Angst, and a bit of trauma, and even more fluff</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 06:48:57</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>9,669</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25773637</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissMoonshine/pseuds/MissMoonshine</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Cassidy dies, Nerissa is imprisoned for eternity. Halinor can't look at the Oracle anymore and Kadma won’t stray from her side. Yan Lin stays with Kandrakar, but everything has repercussions that will affect the rest of their lives.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Halinor Clarkson/Kadma Starlighter</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>don't mess with the memories (of a life passed on)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I never planned on writing anything for WITCH, but after a moment of nostalgia and rewatching the show, well. I discovered that Kalinor was actually a thing and then this was inevitable. So here we are.</p><p>A thank you for Beta reading goes to the marvelous noellefray, you're a dear!</p><p>DISCLAIMER: I do not own W.I.T.C.H. or any and recognisable events from their world.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>'Halinor? Hali, what's wrong?' Panic was seeping into Kadma's voice as she stared helplessly at Halinor. She had her head clutched in her hands, pain twisting her face as her lips formed silent words. Suddenly, as suddenly as the fit had started, Halinor snapped back out of it again and blinked at Kadma.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>'Cassidy's in trouble,' was all she said before grabbing Kadma's arm and teletransporting them over to Yan Lin's place. Their friend looked startled but didn't resist when Halinor pulled her in and transported all three of them away.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When they blinked back into existence, they found themselves on a snowy mountain.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>'Where -'</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>'What are we doing here, Hal?' Yan Lin interrupted Kadma and wrapped her arms around herself, shivering from the cold without so much as a coat. But Halinor ignored both their questions and marched on through the snow, melting her way free, and Kadma and Yan Lin had to hurry to catch up with her again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They had already appeared close to the platform on the mountain top and with the pace Halinor kept, it took them mere minutes to get there. Yet just as Halinor set foot onto it, she stumbled, screamed, clutched her head again and Kadma sank onto her knees next to her in worry. Yan Lin, on the other hand, had pushed past them and saw what Halinor had undoubtedly seen.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Nerissa stood across the platform, by the sharp edge, panting, her eyes wide in horror. She didn’t resist, perhaps not even notice, when Yan Lin pulled her away from the edge with a gentle breeze and put an arm around her shoulders. Neither she nor Kadma had yet realised the full extent of what had just transpired between Cassidy and Nerissa, couldn’t quite grasp the reason for Nerissa’s shock and Halinor fainting.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Not for long.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Get away from her, Yanny,’ Kadma ordered suddenly, her face harder than Yan Lin had ever seen it. In her arms, Halinor was trying to sit up again and despite the tears in her eyes, there was more anger and fury in them than Yan Lin had ever thought her friend capable of. But still she didn’t understand, did Nerissa not deserve to be taken care off too, after whatever had just happened? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She was so lost in thought, patting the shivering Nerissa’s back, that she didn’t realise how Kadma helped Halinor onto her feet again, how much Halinor was shaking, how they made their way over to the edge she had pulled Nerissa away from; only realised they had moved at all when Kadma let out a strangled sob and Halinor turned back to them to fix her eyes on Nerissa. It didn’t matter that she was still held up by Kadma so she wouldn’t collapse again, didn’t matter that there were tears running down her cheeks now, there was something in her look that Yan Lin had never seen before and she was incredibly glad, all of a sudden, that it wasn't directed at her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘You killed her.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Three little words that took an eternity to register before Yan Lin realised what Halinor had said.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘What?’ She whispered and everything in her screamed that it couldn’t be true, that Cassidy was fine, that she wasn’t who Halinor was talking about.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘You killed her.’ Halinor repeated. ‘You pushed her.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Nerissa was shaking her head frantically, her eyes still wide and crazed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘It was an accident.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘No, it wasn’t.’ Halinor’s voice was soft, too soft, and incredibly sad, devout of all the anger she had displayed seconds ago. ‘It wasn’t, Nerissa. You killed Cassidy because you wanted to and you and I, we both know that it’s true. You can’t lie to me, remember?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She tapped her head at that and suddenly Yan Lin understood, in the same moment as Kadma, and she stumbled away from Nerissa while Kadma’s arms tightened around Halinor.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yan Lin didn’t want to look down, still hoping this was a ruse or a horrible nightmare but she knew that she owed it to Cassidy to at least </span>
  <em>
    <span>look </span>
  </em>
  <span>once, so she made her way over to Kadma and Halinor and peaked over the edge.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Halinor hadn’t been lying. Of course not. Hundreds of meters down, on yet another snow covered rock, lay a tiny figure, unmoving and still in a pool of red snow, barely distinguishable from the red hair.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But just as she was about to turn back and say something, blinding white light engulfed all of them and when she opened her eyes again, they all found themselves in the council chamber of Kandrakar.</span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>The Oracle was standing in front of them, furious in a way they had never seen him before, calm and collected as he usually was. Tibor was right behind him, face frozen, while Luba, to their right, was tending to someone laying on a table.</span>
</p><p>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>When Yan Lin carefully turned to look for her other friends, she swallowed. Nerissa was standing next to her, her hands bound with magic but her face did not betray any emotion. Kadma and Halinor, however, weren’t standing. Being transported to Kandrakar must have rendered Halinor unconscious again, for she was once again on the floor, cradled in Kadma’s arms. Yan Lin couldn’t bear to look at Nerissa, nor could she look at the table that must have held Cassidy, so when no one protested, she sank on the ground next to Kadma and gently took Halinor’s hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘What,’ the Oracle finally began, ‘have you done?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>None of them answered - after all, neither Kadma nor Yan Lin even knew what exactly had transpired, had arrived only to see the results. From the three people who would have been able to answer the question, one was dead, one unconscious and one bound, staring at the Oracle in defiance.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘It was an accident;’ Nerissa repeated her earlier words. ‘I only wanted to talk to Cassidy, about the Heart, and then she attacked me -’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘No, she didn’t.’ Halinor’s voice was barely a whisper but it was so quiet in Kandrakar that everyone heard it still. Slowly, supported by both Kadma and Yan Lin, she sat up but kept her eyes closed. ‘Cassidy didn’t attack you, you told her to return the Heart and when she refused, you attacked </span>
  <em>
    <span>her</span>
  </em>
  <span>.’ She paused and fell silent again. Had it not been Kandrakar, there would have been background noise, but in Kandrakar, there was nothing but stiff silence. Everyone was waiting for Halinor to continue but only when Kadma squeezed her hand did she lift her chin to soldier on.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘You used magic against her, Rissy, and she called me, for help - I shouldn’t have waited. If I’d not collected you first, then maybe...maybe I’d have been there in time. You pushed her just before we got there, if we’d just hurried, maybe then, maybe Cassy would still be alive.’ Finally, she opened her eyes but where Kadma and Yan Lin expected tears, there was nothing and they watched in awed horror as she cocked her head to consider the Oracle carefully.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Or would she, Oracle?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘What are you talking about, Hali?’ Kadma whispered in her ear but Halinor continued to keep her stare fixed at the Oracle. This time, Yan Lin squeezed her hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘He knew this would happen, Kadma. He knew if he gave the Heart to Cassidy, Nerissa would go after her. He knew there was a fair chance Cassy would die and he didn’t do anything about it!’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘How-’ Before Yan Lin could finish her question, Kadma interrupted, face twisted with anger as she glared at the Oracle. Yan Lin was fairly certain that, had it not been for Halinor in her arms, Kadma wouldn’t have hesitated to jump on the man. To be fair, he didn’t even make much of an effort to hide his surprise at Halinor’s accusations, and even less tried to deny them.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘You knew?!’ Kadma growled. 'You knew and still gave Cassidy the Heart? You were willing to risk her life - for what? What do you get out of this?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I had hoped,’ the Oracle began with forced calm, ‘that things wouldn’t go this far.’ He held up a soothing hand to prevent any further interruptions and continued, still barely containing the fury in his voice. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Cassidy did what a good keeper of the Heart should do, she protected it with her life. It pains me that she is now, indeed, gone, for I had thought that she could stop greater evil with the Heart.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘You don’t even care about us, do you?’ Again, it was Halinor’s eerily soft voice that cut through the silence. It was blatantly obvious that there was something wrong, something she wasn’t saying but she gave no indication what it was as she went on. ‘You care about the guardians, the protectors, your soldiers - chess pieces in a game only you understand. But you don’t, you never cared about </span>
  <em>
    <span>us</span>
  </em>
  <span>, as people, humans.’ </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Halinor had not put it as a question and from the way Kadma’s eyes narrowed even further, it was clear that she agreed. Yan Lin wasn’t so sure what to think, Halinor wasn’t wrong, for sure, but was she entirely right? Somehow, she got the feeling that she was missing something here, something only Halinor and perhaps Kadma knew.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I detest that notion, I do-’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘If you cared,’ Kadma interrupted harshly, ‘you’d have known better than to give the Heart to Cassidy!’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Her soul was too pure to have ever been corrupted -’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Be that as it may, Oracle, you also knew that Cassidy is the most joyful and gentle one of us! You must have known that giving her the Heart would rip her apart because all she cares about is for us all to be happy - but with Rissy being so angry about her having the Heart, how could she help her? You must have known she’d break herself over that!’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Tell me, Kadma. Had I not given the Heart to Cassidy, who should I have given it to instead? You, perhaps?’ There was surprise in his eyes when Kadma shook her head and </span>
  <em>
    <span>laughed. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I might be proud,’ she said, ‘but I’m not a fool. I know I wouldn’t have done a good job - you’d need someone more compassionate for the Heart than me. Someone who wouldn’t hesitate to stand up to Rissy but would also care enough to not do something foolish - you should have given the Heart to Halinor, or to Yan Lin - but you had to give it to </span>
  <em>
    <span>Cassidy</span>
  </em>
  <span>.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Everyone was silent after Kadma’s outburst, it had been a while since they had last seen her lose her temper like that, but wasn’t it justified this time? Though both Yan Lin and Halinor should have been flattered that Kadma thought them capable keepers for the Heart, in the end, it really made no difference. The Oracle had chosen Cassidy and now she was dead.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Eventually, the silence was disrupted by Luba, who had come to help Halinor up and over to a strangely shaped seat, where she then proceeded to hand her several vials of brightly coloured potions. Neither Yan Lin nor Kadma left her side but in the end, it was Nerissa who put to words what they had all been wondering.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘What happens now?’ she wanted to know and all eyes turned to the Oracle once more. He hesitated to answer, as if he had to consider his options very carefully.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Cassidy’s body will be returned to her element. You, Nerissa, will be sentenced to a lifetime in isolation in the caves of Mount Thanos, for your crime against your comrade and the keeper of the Heart of Kandrakar - forever on the location where you ended her life.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>All four of them, Kadma, Yan Lin, Halinor and Nerissa herself stared at him incredulously, surely he couldn’t be serious? But the Oracle wasn’t finished yet for he finally made his way over to them, the Heart of Kandrakar in his hand once again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Halinor, I am entrusting you with the Heart now, you three shall continue to be our guardians. And while it may hurt to consider now, you will need to find someone to fill the empty spaces, the veil needs five guardians.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kadma gaped at him, could he really be so crude to say they should just...get over the death of their best friend by the hand of their other best friend?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Yan Lin, however, watched as Halinor carefully took the Heart, let the chain run through her fingers thoughtfully without looking at the Oracle.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I felt it, you know? When Cassidy died? I was there. In her head. She was so </span>
  <em>
    <span>scared </span>
  </em>
  <span> and </span>
  <em>
    <span>alone</span>
  </em>
  <span> and she couldn’t keep her mental shields up to keep me out - the opposite, really. She called me and held on and </span>
  <em>
    <span>I </span>
  </em>
  <span>was the one who couldn’t keep her out and I saw it, </span>
  <em>
    <span>felt </span>
  </em>
  <span>it, everything she did when she died, </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything</span>
  </em>
  <span>.’ Finally, she looked up and Yan Lin shivered at the sight of her eyes, finally understanding why Halinor had seemed so off since they arrived in Kandrakar.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘It should be an honour that you want me to be the Keeper of the Heart but I think I need to be a guardian for that.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘After what you did to Cassidy </span>
  <em>
    <span>and </span>
  </em>
  <span>Nerissa...we’re done, Oracle. We’re done being your soldiers, done being guardians.’ Silence fell at Kadma’s words as Halinor dropped the Heart back into the Oracle’s limp hand. </span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>The Oracle stared at them for a long, silent moment and both Halinor and Kadma stared right back. They were sure of their next steps, knew what they had to do, how to proceed - even if they didn’t quite know yet how they would go on after this. Knowing the next step and taking it were, after all, two very different things.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘You cannot just stop being guardians,’ the Oracle stated softly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Says who? You never said there were any rules to being a guardian.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘If you give up your duty as guardians, you forfeit your future on the council and will never again be welcome in Kandrakar.’ The Oracle didn’t even acknowledge the question but the consequences of what they were about to do suddenly screamed at Yan Lin. It seemed like everyone had made a choice, everyone was trying to pull her in one direction or another, and she wasn’t quite sure yet whom to follow. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kadma and Halinor would leave, she knew that without doubt. Somehow, in the short time they had spent in Kandrakar, they had come to that decision together and they were both too stubborn to waver now and change their minds again. Cassidy, the first friend she made in Heatherfield when she was but six years old, was dead. And Nerissa, her best friend over the last decade, had killed her. And here she was, staring at what was left of their friendship, nothing but smoke and ruins. Leaving Kandrakar sounded tempting, but while Halinor and Kadma had each other, Yan Lin would be alone. Not that they’d leave her out, but it wasn’t the same. Giving up being a guardian...it wasn’t something she thought she’d be able to bear on top of everything else. But would that mean she’d have to give up on Halinor and Kadma, stop being their friend? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Once again, it seemed that outside her own thoughts, the world had continued and she found all eyes in the room on herself. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Well, Yan Lin? Will you, too, doom Kandrakar?’ the Oracle questioned and she slowly shook her head. She didn’t dare to look at her friends, certain to find anger and outrage on their faces. Had she looked, she’d have realised she was wrong - at least in Halinor’s case, as her blonde friend seemed sad, but resigned, like she had already known what her answer would be.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Perhaps she had known - with all their emotions running so high, controlling the shields around their minds didn’t seem as important.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There was an oddly relieved expression on the Oracle’s face and he handed her the Heart rather unceremoniously. A wave of his hands and Nerissa, face pale and afraid, was pulled into a crystal that was simply dropped through a fold in space, not even deemed worthy to be properly dropped off by someone caring. Another unceremonious wave and Halinor and Kadma transformed back, suddenly looking oddly out of place in their plain clothing between the pompous walls of Kandrakar. She hadn't even realised that they had transformed when they were brought over. Then the Oracle told Yan Lin to take them back to Earth and their protests that they’d want to say goodbye to Cassidy were silenced coldly - only guardians and believers in Kandrakar were allowed to stay.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They left without a word of goodbye and already, for the first but not the last time, did Yan Lin wonder if she had made the right decision. </span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>‘We have to tell the police.’ It was remarkable, Kadma thought, that despite everything, despite being the most immediately affected, Halinor was still the one to keep a cool head. Then again, she was - no, she had been - the guardian of fire and if she had been as hot tempered as her element suggested, many a world would have burned under her anger.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘But we can’t tell them that Cassy’s dead, because there’s no body,’ she continued and Kadma nodded, watching her closely as she paced in front of the fireplace. ‘Nerissa’s gone too, also no body, so we can’t even blame it on her. We should have called them right after it happened, but we were in goddamn Kandrakar, so calling them now would be very suspicious -’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Hali, calm down -we’ll figure something out,’ Kadma tried to interfere with her rambling but Halinor just glared at her. Not that it had much of an effect on Kadma.‘I know we need to have an explanation when people start asking questions, and we need to check it with Yan Lin, little as I like it - but I’m feeling...drained without my powers and I’m sure you feel no different- and you’ve been through a lot more than me today!’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Halinor looked like she wanted to argue but when she saw the genuine concern in Kadma’s eyes, she sighed deeply and sunk onto the sofa next to her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘You’re right, of course you are,’ she mumbled, burying her face in Kadma’s shoulder as she wrapped an arm around her. They fell asleep like that, not long after, holding tight onto each other for strength and warmth.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>In the end, they didn’t go to the police - what should they tell them? They got their stories straight with Yan Lin and when the police showed up with questions about their friends’ whereabouts, they reluctantly told them that they hadn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>known</span>
  </em>
  <span> anything but had suspected they might want to leave together to study in New York - but no, they hadn’t been involved helping them get away and might they request to be told if they actually found them?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The policemen had no reason to doubt their story - they matched and after a decade of lying about being a guardian, lying to the police about their friends’ fate wasn’t actually hard. When they called, weeks, months later, to tell them that the inquiry about Cassidy and Nerissa was put on hold due to a lack of new clues, all three of them were quietly relieved, not that they’d let each other know. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was a chapter of their story closed and Halinor knew, with sudden, eerie clarity, that they would move on in different directions. Sort of. Because she couldn’t possibly imagine going anywhere without Kadma. Yan Lin, on the other hand, had different duties, for Kandrakar still, putting together and training a new team of guardians. From what they had seen so far, she wasn’t doing well. And as much as Halinor wanted to help her friend, she also wanted to just put Kandrakar behind her and </span>
  <em>
    <span>move on. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kadma hadn’t really forgiven Yan Lin for choosing Kandrakar and had let soft-spoken Halinor handle most of their interactions over the last few weeks. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘We should move,’ she said one evening, out of nowhere. Halinor, however, seemed completely unfazed as she looked up from her book and smiled.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Where to?’ was all she asked and Kadma, too, had to smile.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Perhaps Fadden Hills?’ Kadma suggested. ‘It’s not too far to be unreachable in case something happens here but…’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘But we’d be away from here, where we have so many memories everywhere we look,’ Halinor finished for her and Kadma nodded. It was funny, how even without Halinor’s telepathic powers, she always knew what Kadma was thinking. ’I think it’s a marvelous idea, Kad. We need to start fresh and we can’t do that here.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘No. We can’t.’</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Their house in Fadden Hills was a lot bigger than their flat in Heatherfield had been but they had no intention to move again anytime soon. Besides, it had to have certain features they deemed necessary. Like the conservatory Kadma couldn’t go without and the observatory Halinor insisted on, because how else was she to work from home if she couldn’t watch the stars she studied?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Really, the house was way too big for just the two of them but they made sure to change that quickly. They didn’t even know whose idea it was but in the end, that didn’t matter anyway. What did matter, however, was that they ended up establishing a foundation for children in need, thinking of the two friends they had lost years ago: Cassidy, the rising star, the silent, shining patron to guide the children they cared for. And Nerissa, from a horrid home that, they were sure, had played a crucial role in making her a woman who killed for power.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Even after decades, neither of them agreed with the Oracle’s punishment for Nerissa, what was the point of locking her away in solitude, never to feel human contact again, with no chance for redemption? There wasn’t anything they could do about that, though, so they conceded to keeping an eye on the mountain.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neither of them had spoken to Yan Lin since they had left either. They kept an eye on her too, knew she had gotten married and had a son eventually, had trained several groups on guardians - who all failed and broke apart, unable to cope with the pressure. When she had fallen pregnant, she had given up the heart for good, to a group of new guardians with a lot of promise to actually do the job well. Yan Lin knew her old friends were watching her but just like they didn’t contact her, she never tried to get back in touch with them. There were too many painful memories between them.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And despite everything, despite the tragedy they experienced in their twenties, Kadma and Halinor moved on, became respected and well-loved members of Fadden Hills’ society. Oh, there were rumours about their Boston marriage, but no one actually </span>
  <em>
    <span>knew</span>
  </em>
  <span> anything and they didn’t think that anybody’s business but their own. And none of the rumours about them, even those about their past, were spiteful, quite the opposite. People spoke about those two kind women in the big house only with warmth and respect and love.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was their own little version of perfection, but most importantly, they were happy. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>If only happiness could last forever. But all things too blissful are bound to come crashing down one day, and for Halinor and Kadma, things went down without any warning beforehand. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was 1995. They had just said goodbye to little Will from down the street, who would be very special one day, being born under Cassidy’s star, and were just settling down with a cup of tea when Halinor gasped.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her cup shattered on the floor as she clutched her head and nearly cried in pain. Kadma was by her side in an instant, suddenly feeling like she stepped back in time to the day Cassidy died, when Halinor had been overwhelmed by her power. But they had no more powers now, they were human, and while a little magic might have still been possible for both of them, the telepathy was not, they had tried.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I’m fine, Kad,’ Halinor whispered moments later and managed to place herself on a chair with a semblance of dignity left.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘No, you’re not. Don’t try lying, Hal. What happened?’ Kadma was worried, more than she could remember ever being before. Halinor shook her head carefully, testing for the pain, but then seemed to decide that it was fine.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I’m good, Kad. Promise, I am. I have..I have no idea what just happened.’ She had a very good idea, actually, but no explanation. Kadma didn’t seem to believe her, eyes narrowed as she tilted Halinor’s chin this way and that, trying to see if there was any visible damage that could have caused her pain.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Kadma,’ Halinor tried again, gently. She placed her hands on Kadma’s, softly squeezing them. ‘I don’t know what just happened. It just hurt for a moment, I’m fine now -’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘That’s not normal, Hal, you know that. I...Halinor, I’m worried about you. I might pretend to be strong, but you and I, we both know I couldn’t go on without you.’ </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Oh Kadma. I’m not going anywhere. We’ve got the rest of our lives before us yet, and I have absolutely no intention of leaving you alone.’ She smiled softly and directed Kadma down to sit next to her. In the chaos moments ago, her loose braid had unraveled and Halinor couldn’t help running her fingers through those silvery black strands, brushing them back, tucking them behind her ears. Her fingers came to rest on Kadma’s face and she gently brushed her thumbs over her cheeks. This time, it was Kadma who placed her hands on top, stopping the faint motion, holding her tight.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I’ll call the doctor’s now, you’ll go and have your head looked at tomorrow.’ It wasn’t a question but Halinor nodded anyway. Of the two of them, she was the one with less qualms to show affection but Kadma cared just as much - she just didn’t quite know how to show it, sometimes. ‘Promise?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Promise.’ Finally, a smile found its way to Kadma’s lips and she quickly pressed them to Halinor’s forehead, a silent ‘thank you’ for not putting up a fight.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>If Halinor was a little more clingy that evening as they finally settled on the couch, Kadma didn’t comment on it. By the next morning, everything seemed to be back to normal and they went about their day, like they always did.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Only, when Kadma left for a meeting with the financial director of the foundation at ten, did Halinor take the phone to call a number she hadn’t dialed in almost three decades.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When Kadma opened the door that evening, sick with worry because Halinor should have been back from her appointment hours ago, and saw the policemen on her doorstep, her world came tumbling down once again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Yan Lin stood in the back row at Halinor Clarkson’s funeral. She was confused and worried but she didn’t think she had any right to comfort Kadma after all these years. Then again, perhaps she knew more about the strange call just hours before the crash. It still felt wrong, to think Halinor had died in a car crash, barreling off the road and into a tree. She had been too careful a driver, always, after she had lost her brother in a car crash too. Yan Lin could still remember how stiff her friend had been for weeks after that funeral.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It didn’t matter now, Halinor was dead and gone and it was just Kadma and her left, and Kadma would probably lash out when she saw her, because they had never made up.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But Yan Lin couldn’t not go and talk to her, give her condolences and perhaps a hug, for old time’s sake. And to her surprise, Kadma allowed the hug, clung to her a moment too long before wiping away another of the tears she so desperately tried not to cry.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Thank you for coming, Yan Lin,’ she said, ‘Hal-Halinor would have liked you to be here.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I couldn’t not come,’ Yan Lin answered, looking up at Kadma’s face. She held her head high and her shoulders so straight and stiff it must hurt, but with the grief in her eyes, she seemed smaller than ever. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Kadma - I was wondering.’ Better get this over with. Kadma frowned, but nodded for her to continue. ‘Do you know what she wanted, why she wanted to speak to the Oracle?’ </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘What?’ The look on Kadma’s face was so full of pain and confusion that Yan Lin wanted to slap herself. She should have realised that whatever Halinor had wanted, it wasn’t something Kadma was in on - but that didn’t tell her why she wanted to talk to the Oracle of Kandrakar, three decades after she left in anger and accusations.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Halinor would have never gone back there,’ Kadma said coldly, once again collected and aloof. ‘I can’t imagine why she would ask you about something like that, but I assure you, she didn’t want to redeem herself in the eyes of Kandrakar. Now, Yan Lin, I believe it is time for you to leave.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After that, they didn’t speak to each other for another 10 years. Only when, in 2005, Yan Lin’s granddaughter and friends took over as guardians, did Kadma receive a note from her old friend.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I don’t know how, but she is on the Council of Kandrakar.</span>
  </em>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Nerissa freed herself from her prison, Cassidy came back to life and they were all turned into young guardians again - all under Nerissa’s claw, minions of her reign of terror, unable to act or think for themselves.</span>
</p><p>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>Halinor pulled back into the deepest, farthest corner of her mind and locked herself away there. That way, she had no control over her body, but at least her mind stayed her own and well defended. How Nerissa hadn’t thought to use her knowledge of Kandrakar, Halinor didn’t know, but she’d rather not risk that knowledge falling into the wrong hands either.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Luba had thought her cowardly, that she wasn’t trusting towards the new guardians but she knew, better than anyone on the council, how easy it was to defeat a new guardian - and Nerissa was old and experienced. When Nerissa had come to lure her away, trick her into becoming the quinto-guardian, she had already been busy locking away all the things she couldn’t let Nerissa know under any circumstances. Her body had been on autopilot, so to speak, her mind busy elsewhere, and while her body had fallen into Nerissa’s trap easily, her mind had stayed hidden and free below the surface of the enchantment.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her perception of time was off, but when the spell was lifted and she saw Kadma again - alive, both of them, able to hug her and touch her and kiss her - all she wanted to do was throw herself in her arms and cry until there were no more tears left and confess and tell her everything. But then they were locked in the Heart of Meridian with half a dozen other people and only when they were out again, after what felt like an awkward eternity, were the two of them able to talk.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Much like Cassidy, Halinor had a living body again, but she was still as old as she had been when she died. It was odd, sitting on their kitchen table across from Kadma, who was staring at her with a mixture of anger, disbelief and relief that was barely feasible. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Explain.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I’m sorry I left you,’ Halinor said instead of beginning with the explanation Kadma demanded. Carefully, she reached over to Kadma to grab her hands and squeeze them gently. ‘I promised not to leave you and then I did anyway - not that I wanted, I’d never have left you if I had the choice, but…’ She trailed off, lost in memory for a moment until Kadma tried to detangle their fingers. Halinor just held on tighter.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘The day before I died, remember when I almost collapsed?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Of course,’ Kadma huffed indignantly but didn’t get the chance to add anything else because Halinor already continued.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I...I thought I had it under control after, again, like I used to. But without being fueled by a Heart...well, it was a lot harder and they refused to help me, so -’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘What,’ Kadma interrupted sharply, ‘are you on about? You had a stroke and I should have taken you to the hospital right away, never let you drive - </span>
  <em>
    <span>Kandrakar</span>
  </em>
  <span>,’ she spat the name, ‘has </span>
  <em>
    <span>nothing</span>
  </em>
  <span> to do with it.’ This time, she succeeded in pulling her hands free and Halinor tiredly rubbed her temples.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Thing is...it does. I didn’t have a stroke, Kadma. And no hospital could have done anything to help me - hell, I’d most likely ended up being committed if I told the doctors what was wrong.’ There was an uncharacteristic bitterness in her voice but despite the hardness in her eyes, she seemed sincere. Kadma tilted her head, just minimally, but even after a decade of separation, Halinor was so attuned to her that she immediately got the signal and continued.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘You remember the day Cassidy died - of course you do. You also remember how having her in my mind almost knocked me out? How I was so desperate in the beginning when I got the telepathy powers because I didn’t know how to lock people out and it drove me crazy? Well, that day...the telepathy came back. No warning, no apparent reason, just snap, it was back. I...it took me a moment to put up the shields, then it was fine, but it was draining me and I shouldn’t have been driving, you’re right there. I was hoping it’d fade again but I had to keep up the shields and I was terrified and I lost concentration for a moment - and then there were hundreds, </span>
  <em>
    <span>thousands </span>
  </em>
  <span>of voices in my head and I…I just lost control of the car. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you back then, Kadma.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Why didn’t you?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I was terrified - I had no explanation, I didn’t want those powers, I’d given them up, hadn’t I? But then...I didn’t want to worry you even more - I was terribly foolish, wasn’t I?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Yes.’ Halinor flinched. One word, cutting through her like a dagger, so cold and sharp, the kind of anger Kadma had never before directed at her. But she deserved it, or did she not?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘How did you end up in Kandrakar?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I called Yan Lin, the next day. Not that I told her what happened, but I thought she could put me in touch with Kandrakar - I didn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>want</span>
  </em>
  <span> to involve them, but where else would my sudden powers come from? They refused to see me, said I’d turned my back on them, so I couldn’t come back for my convenience - that was the message they sent me. A few hours later, I was dead.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Next thing I know, I wake up in Kandrakar and the Oracle himself admits that he made a mistake - twice, not helping me and giving the Heart to Cassidy, inadvertently killing us both. He apologised - not that I wanted to hear that, mind you, I lost any respect for him when I saw into his mind the day Cassy died. But when I was there, in Kandrakar, the voices were silent again.’ She paused, closed her eyes for a moment to take a deep breath.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Luba was the one who told me what happened. The guardians at the time, their fire guardian somehow absorbed the power of the Heart of a dying fire world, but then she was killed in a fight not long after. All her power, plus the power of the Heart she absorbed, went back into her auramere - but they’re not designed to hold the power of a Heart, so it had to dispose some of the excess energy. We were guardians longer than anyone else, so even after decades, I was the one the auramere knew best - when I nearly fainted, that’s when I got that sudden powersurge. But it only fueled passive powers, like the telepathy, and I couldn’t use the power to put up mental shields…’ Again, Halinor trailed off, leaving the unfinished sentence hanging with all the implications. It seemed like Kadma needed to contemplate all she had just heard, for she was silently staring at her, but Halinor wasn’t quite finished yet.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Cassidy was killed and therefore unable to ever sit on the Council, but the Oracle offered I could, despite turning on them. What did he call it? A peace offering, a redemption of their mistakes. He said they didn’t think their mistakes had been mistakes at the time, that they’d need someone to tell them when they’re wrong and about to do something stupid. Well. Tibor put it that way.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘So you stayed.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I didn’t want to. I wasn’t sure how I could, all alone - but then I thought that one day, there’d be another group of young guardians and didn’t they deserve someone who cared about them, not about their value to Kandrakar?’ She shrugged. ‘I told the Oracle I’d stay until you died too. Then they’d either offer you a position on the council too or I’d be allowed to leave and go on into the afterlife with you. They wanted me to stay, so they agreed.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Once again, silence stretched between them and this time, Halinor was done. She leaned back in her chair to watch Kadma consider her words, her confession, unknowing what her reaction would be.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘We will never be free of Kandrakar, will we?’ Kadma asked eventually.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I don’t think we will, no.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Are you going back?'</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>'I don't want to,' Halinor said carefully, 'but the Council will want me to. Then again, no one said anything about leaving if I somehow came back to life.' She shrugged. 'I can't stay here though - I died ten years ago, I can't just come back to life.'</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>'Go back to Kandrakar, then.'</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>'Kadma, stop, please. I screwed up, I know. I should have told you what was going on ten years ago and I shouldn't have been driving and I should have told everything the moment I saw you, no matter that everyone else was locked in the Heart with us. If you want me to leave, I will, of course - but if you want me to stay, I'll stay.' </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Like so often, Kadma didn't say anything, just kept silently looking at Halinor. The tea they made hours ago was cold in their cups and on the wall, the clock kept ticking steadily.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Halinor just kept staring back, her eyes wide and sad, afraid of the decision Kadma would make. Afraid what she'd say, if she'd forgive her, if they could start anew somewhere else, retire somewhere happier, or if Kadma would send her away back to Kandrakar, the reason for all their sorrow.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Across from her, Kadma's thoughts were whirling as she tried to make sense of what she had just been told, of what the future could bring. She couldn't bear looking at Halinor, but she could bear looking away even less, drinking in the sight of her - the real her, not her teenage-guardian-version - for the first time in a decade. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Of course she had always missed Halinor, had known part of her had died when she did, but now, seeing her again, talking to her? It only made her realise how much she had really missed her. But that didn't change the fact that for years, she had tried to move on, only to now learn that Halinor had never really been dead after all. She had gone on to live in goddamn Kandrakar, of all places. And yet, despite her anger about that, Kadma couldn't work up much anger at Halinor herself. There was some, yes, but it was old anger, had faded over years and turned into sorrow and self loathing. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>'You died,' she said, so sudden that Halinor had to bite back a squeal at the sudden breach of silence. Kadma ignored her, went on. 'I thought you were dead, Hal. For ten years, I grieved you, missed you, had to somehow go on without you, and all that time, you were in Kandrakar. No, don't say anything. I don't want to hear another apology. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>'I thought I would never see you again. I blamed myself, told myself that I should have taken better care of you -'</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>'None of it was your fault! Kadma, you can't imagine how sorry I am for putting you through that. I never wanted to leave you, </span>
  <em>
    <span>die </span>
  </em>
  <span>on you, and I certainly never wanted you to blame yourself!'</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>'But I did, Hal. I did blame myself, because that's easier than to blame </span>
  <em>
    <span>you. </span>
  </em>
  <span>I could </span>
  <em>
    <span>never </span>
  </em>
  <span>blame you.' A single tear found its way down her cheek, but neither woman acknowledged it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>'I still don't blame you. Hell, Halinor, I know how much you hated Kandrakar. That you stayed there anyway...I could have never done that. You're a much better person than I could ever be, because you thought of those young guardians in the future and stayed for them, even if you could have moved on.'</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>'I didn't want to go without you,' Halinor confessed softly, looking up through her lashes, searching for Kadma's eyes.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>'I don't want you to lose you again. I couldn't bear it - I don't think I would make it, Hal, if you left again.'</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>'Then I'll stay.'</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There was no smile on Halinor's lips, just a very serious expression, but Kadma's face shone with relief and this time, her hands reached out to squeeze Halinor's.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>'I haven't forgiven you for everything yet,' she said slowly, 'but you're back, and that is more important than all those other, meaningless things.'</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>'Thank you.' Halinor's voice cracked, all the tension suddenly falling off, and the ice broke. How they made it up to the bedroom, neither of them knew, but it hadn't changed a bit since Halinor's death - and wasn't that strange to think about, walking through your house, alive, ten years after you died?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They just held onto each other till morning, hair and pillows wet from the tears they cried as they told each other all their sorrows, all the things that happened, how they missed each other and how they dared to dream of going on together now. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>By the time dawn was breaking, their fingers stopped trailing each other’s features, creating new, old memories, as they finally fell asleep in each other's arms.</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Hali?’ She turned around to look at the speaker, even though she would have recognised the voice anywhere. ‘Can we talk?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Of course.’ Cassidy gave her a small smile and Halinor couldn’t help but notice how odd it was that her childhood friend was barely 25, when she herself was an old woman. But while being dead had made Cassidy gain some wisdom, it didn’t mean she had grown up for real. She still looked the same and had grown wise in death, but she was still very much a young woman. Halinor, on the other hand, had the wisdom of life that came from experience, as well as the wisdom found only in the patience of Kandrakar. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She smiled back at her young old friend and silently led her down a narrow corridor towards the Council members’ quarters. Neither of them could help themselves, they just had to admire the intricate decorations grazing the freshly rebuilt walls of Kandrakar’s fortress. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>That was why they had been in Kandrakar again in the first place, to rebuild it. Will had offered to fold them all through, so Kadma had driven her over to Heatherfield. Both she and Mira - leave it to Yan Lin to keep her altermere, breaching every single rule about astral drops there was - had decided to stay behind, neither particularly welcome in Kandrakar and Kadma rather uncertain if she could control her temper towards the Oracle. Still, even without the two of them, there had been dozens of helpers and volunteers who wanted to help raise the fortress again and they had been doing just that for most of the day. Now they were finished and while some had already left for their own homes again, most of them were still in the main hall, feasting, chatting and enjoying themselves.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Halinor’s rooms were just as she remembered them. The private quarters had stayed almost untouched during the battles, being deep inside the fortress and hard to hit from the outside.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘What did you want to speak about, Cassidy?’ She asked once they had both seated themselves in the armchairs. For a long moment, Cassidy was silent and just eyed Halinor with unabashed curiosity. She couldn’t really be blamed for that, after all, she was living the reverse of Halinor in that moment, being young still when all her friends were old women already. Eventually though, her eyes found Halinor’s and she bit her lip.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I wanted to apologise, Hali,’ she said, making her friend blink in surprise.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Whatever are you apologising for?’ Halinor wondered in genuine confusion. The look Cassidy gave her was full of disbelief, could she really not know what she was talking about. It certainly seemed so.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘For pulling you in?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Pulling me in? Into what?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘My mind? When I died?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Oh.’ Whatever Halinor had been expecting, it certainly wasn’t that. Cassidy used her surprise to push on immediately.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I didn’t mean to make you see - </span>
  <em>
    <span>feel </span>
  </em>
  <span>my death, I saw, from beyond, that it was really hard and I know you also blamed yourself but it was </span>
  <em>
    <span>never</span>
  </em>
  <span> your fault and I just need you to know that </span>
  <em>
    <span>I</span>
  </em>
  <span> never blamed you - you were there, in my mind, and when Nerissa pushed me over the edge, when I fell, it was </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span> who kept me from despair because if I had been all alone, I would have totally panicked but I didn’t because you were there and kept me grounded, but it was horrible for you - worse than for me, I guess, I mean, I </span>
  <em>
    <span>died</span>
  </em>
  <span> but at least I didn’t have to deal with that afterwards but you felt that too and you lived so -’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Cassy,’ Halinor interrupted gently and Cassidy froze, eyes wide - once upon a time, she would have known what Halinor would say but now? She had no idea how her friend would react. Though going by her warm smile, it hopefully wouldn’t be too bad…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Cassy, I’ve died too. It was quite gruesome and if I could have someone else to soothe my mind and soul in those moments...I would have given a lot for that. But even before that, I might have had a hard time dealing with it - but Cassy, I </span>
  <em>
    <span>never </span>
  </em>
  <span>blamed you for being afraid in the moments before your death.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘But you blamed yourself.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Denying it would have been a lie, and Halinor had been living in Kandrakar too long to give into that temptation when it was so frowned upon here. So she gave a nonchalant shrug, her gaze fixed in the distance.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘For some time, yes. I thought that if I had come right away, I might have been able to stop Nerissa - I knew what she was going to do when you called me. I wouldn’t have hesitated to stop her, and I know I could have but I was too late. For </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span>, I blamed myself. But never for what Nerissa did.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘But you were suffering -’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Cassy, one of my best friends had died, another one was imprisoned and the friendship with Yanny was cracking. And I had felt everything you felt, before and while dying. I don’t blame you for it but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t hard to deal with. I had nightmares for months after it - but I had Kadma, and she took care of me and it got better. We both did.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘So you’re not mad?’ Cassidy reassured herself and Halinor shook her head with a small smile.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Of course not. Cassy, none of what happened was ever, in any way, your fault. If anyone was to blame, it was the Oracle -’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘If you blamed him, then how did you end up sitting on the Council?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>With a deep sigh, Halinor gave Cassidy a quick recap of what exactly had transpired right before and after her own death. And wasn’t it strange, how easy it was to talk about their deaths and all the pain they brought with them? But then again, they had both had enough time to come to peace with what had happened and they had, after all, both died. It was an odd kind of kinship that dying brought and it wasn’t something anyone still alive would ever be able to understand. That wasn’t changed by the fact that both of them had now come back to life - they had died, been dead for years, an experience incomparable to anything else.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘So...what are you going to do now?’ Cassidy wanted to know, not even trying to hide her curiosity.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I’ve spoken to the Oracle earlier, he allowed me to go back to life outside Kandrakar - though he didn’t want me to give up my seat here, so I have to drop by then and now when the Council is discussing things related to the guardians. It’s that or stay here completely.’ She gave another small shrug and pulled out a silver necklace from under her robes. ‘Luba even gave me this. It-’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘What is it?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘It’s a part of the Heart that overloaded the fire auramere. When we got out of Nerissa’s seal and were on earth, my telepathy got out of control again - it seems there is still some residue of power left, but I can’t use it. I’d go insane if I couldn’t block it on earth, been almost there, done that, twice. Luba said it is just enough to allow me proper mental shields.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘How did you get by here then?’ It seemed that even death hadn’t changed Cassidy, she was still full of questions about everything, like she had always been. The thought made Halinor’s smile widen.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘They might have insisted on everyone shielding their minds after I accused the Oracle of </span>
</p><p>
  <span>killing you? But you know, most of the Council communicates solely through telepathy, so…’ She trailed off but Cassidy nodded. After a moment, her face turned serious again as she cocked her head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Hali? You can just take up your life on earth again, can you? They said they’d provide us with the documents to return - but I can’t, Hali!’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘What exactly do you mean?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I was </span>
  <em>
    <span>dead</span>
  </em>
  <span> for forty years! My mother might be fooled into thinking I came back, but I can’t just pick up where I left off! I’m still 23 - you and Kadma and Yanny, how old are you? 65? My mum - Hali, I can’t stay with her, I’d have to lie about everything, all the time!’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Calm down, Cassy, please.’ Unlike Cassidy, who’s voice had turned shrill in her distress, Halinor was still as calm as ever as she carefully placed her hands on Cassidy’s shoulders. ‘We might have aged and grown up in the last forty years, but you’ll always be our friend. I understand that it’s not going to be easy, that would be nice for once, but you know that we’ll always be there for you?’ </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Slowly, Cassidy nodded and Halinor smiled.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘No matter what you decide to do, we won’t leave you hanging. Kadma and I would be thrilled if you wanted to stay with us and if you want to live on your own, we’d be just a happy to help you settle in -’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Whatever she was going to say, she never did because Cassidy threw her arms around her neck and clung to Halinor, suddenly sobbing like a lost child - and in a way, that was exactly what she was right then. Halinor was startled, but only for a moment before she pulled Cassidy close and held her as she, for the first time, cried off all the tears she had held back since the day the Oracle entrusted her with the Heart. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was yet another one of those things that never changed, Halinor mused. She had always been closest to Kadma and had been the least close one to Nerissa, but her relationship with Cassidy had always been special. In their group, she had been the oldest and Cassidy the baby, almost two years younger than Halinor. She loved Yan Lin as her best friend and Nerissa...well, they were thick as thieves before everything went south. But whenever she needed a shoulder to cry on or advice, Cassidy had turned to Halinor and somehow, it was soothing to know that that still rang true now, after all that had happened.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Thank you.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was barely a whisper and had there not been utter silence around them, Halinor was certain she wouldn’t have heard. But she had and smiled, pressing a soft kiss on Cassidy’s hair before pulling back.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘It’s alright. We’re good. We’ll be fine.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘I hope so…’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘We will be. Trust me?’ She stepped towards the door and held out a hand. Cassidy took it without hesitation.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Of course. Always.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘Then let’s go back to life.’</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Starting over living was, by no means, easy. They told people Halinor had been in a witness protection program not even Kadma had known about and could only now come back safely. They claimed Cassidy to have been there with her, her niece in her cover story, who had nowhere to go now and therefore came back with her to Fadden Hills. But Halinor still looked exactly like she had the day she died and people noticed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Eventually, they decided that it would be most sensible to move back to Heatherfield, into a lovely little house. It still had a conservatory and an observatory and an extra guest bedroom that was painted in Cassidy’s favourite blue. Turned out the new guardians - and to Kadma and Halinor, they would always be the new guardians - loved having a parent free zone and somehow claimed the parlour for themselves. Not that they minded - it was nice, to have all that life and laughter fill their home every day when for years, they had both suffered in the empty silence of a too big house and a cold fortress. And besides, it was rather practical to have Will closeby whenever Halinor needed to get to Kandrakar on council business. According to the Oracle, she could fold over herself with the Mini-Heart around her neck, but why bother when Will was so happy to help out?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Cassidy stayed with them, sometimes, and sometimes, she stayed with her mother. She took up her studies again, medicine - she didn’t even mind having to start anew, all the innovations were totally worth it, she claimed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Yan Lin brought Mira over for tea at least every other day - they had been stuck in Nerissa’s seal and had been trying for harmony there, but harmony couldn’t come without forgiveness. It wasn’t perfect yet, but somehow, they all started to make up again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Even Kadma, who still frowned every time Halinor pecked her cheek and threw on her white robe to go to Kandrakar, eventually softened about that matter - she had always been a stubborn and hard woman, had become even more so in the past decade. But Halinor came often back with shining eyes, reporting that the Oracle and the Council had agreed to yet another of her suggestions that would make those five girls as safe as possible, so Kadma re-assessed. She had only ever known Halinor to be an excellent judge of character and she was well aware that people could change. So perhaps she should trust Halinor to not be foolish, trust that even the Oracle could learn from his mistakes. Perhaps in time, she could even learn to not resent Kandrakar quite so much anymore - until then, she’d just listen to their reports.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They had also taken to training the young guardians. Well. Training might have been the wrong word - teaching, really. Neither of them had their powers any longer, but they could still share their years of experience, which those five girls seemed to be soaking up like sponges. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was almost funny how everything turned out in the end, how everyone lived and was happy, despite all the death and despair barely a few months ago.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘We’re so lucky, having all these people here now, alive and here - I’m glad we’re not alone anymore, Kad,’ Halinor whispered one night in bed, Kadma’s arms wrapped securely around her. Kadma shifted slightly, fingers brushing over Halinor’s hair as she contemplated her answer.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘The luckiest thing is that I got you back, Hal,’ she whispered. ‘But I’m happy too that everything worked out the way it did too.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>For a long moment, they laid in silence, the only sound the ticking of the clock and their breathing. Halinor snuggled closer to Kadma, who didn’t protest, just pulled her in even tighter.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘It didn’t go like we wanted.’ Halinor’s voice broke the silence again after a long while, gentle and soft. ‘But I’m happy with the turnout. I got you, and we’ve got a future. It’s not how we imagined it, but...it’s ours. We’ll make the best of it, will we?’ It wasn’t really a question but it made Kadma smile into the darkness and gently place a kiss on Halinor’s forehead.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>‘The very best.’</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>The end.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Things I assumed for this story:<br/>- Kadma, like in the comics, stayed on Earth instead of becoming Queen of Zombala<br/>- Halinor, like in the comics, has died at some point prior to WITCH becoming guardians. She is, however, a member of the council like in the cartoon<br/>- Both Kadma and Halinor denounced the council after Cassidy's death</p><p>So...basically the comic storyline, except for Halinor being on the council anyway?</p></blockquote></div></div>
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